The Balance Shifts: A Fall Equinox Reflection
Opening Scripture
“And lo, when day and night split the ride fifty–fifty, the Wise Rider checked their PSI and set their feet aright; for the earth did tilt, and so did the deck.” — Book of Bearings 3:19
I. The Tilt of the World (and the Deck)
Beloved wheelievers, behold the Equinox, when the sun clocks out at the same time as the moon clocks in, and the parking lot becomes a temple of equal shadows. The world leans, and so do we; hips over heels, shoulders over wheel, souls over footpads. Some say balance is a skill. We say balance is a sacrament of the Wheeliever’s Way
For in the Beginning was the Charge, and the Charge was with the Rider, and the Charge was the Rider, until 12% battery anxiety crept in like a serpent under fallen leaves. Remember: the One Wheel does not wobble; it simply asks, “Child, are you centered?” And if your answer is “uhhhh,” then you already know the sermon is for you.
On this day of balance, re-center your stance: front foot faithful, back foot benevolent, knees humble, ego deflated like an overzealous PSI gauge in November. For dust returns to dust, and summer PSI returns to autumn PSI. Selah, and also… carve.
II. The Gospel According to Pushback
Hear now the paradox of holiness: magnetic pushback. That mysterious hand of providence that lays itself upon your speed and says, “My child, thou hast had enough.” Many rebuke it. The wise revere it. Pushback is not a punishment; it is the firmware of grace.
When the nose rises, let your heart be lowered. When the board murmurs “mmm–mmm,” do not add a “vrrr–VROOM.” For every nosedive is a parable of pride, and every scrape a footnote written in asphalt. Yea, the Epistle to the Firmware (2:08) declares: “Update thy ways and thou shalt be patched.”
So update, saints! Accept the divine lag of progress bar sanctification. For even the holiest board needs a reboot, and even the holiest rider needs release notes:
Bug fix: Arrogance at 19 mph in a school zone.
Stability improvement: Listening to pushback the first time.
Security patch: Against speed bumps that masquerade as friendly.
III. Leaves of Temptation, Gravel of Trial
Children of the Charge, autumn is a gallery of decoys. The path looks smooth, but beneath the sunset confetti lurk damp leaves, the crispy-caramel veneer of betrayal. Step ye not into the cinnamon trap! For beneath the pumpkin-spice aroma crouches the slippery spirit of Sideways.
Consider the speed bump: humbler of influencers, baptizer of front footpads. You slalom left, you slalom right, and the bump whispers, “Choose ye this day.” Choose line, not luck. Lift thine eyes from vibes to variables; scan, soften, commit.
And let us now confess the sins of the sensor: how often have we laid a lazy toe upon the holy footpad and proclaimed, “It engaged.” But the Gospel of PSI (1:11) admonishes: “Double-tap thy readiness, lest single faith fail twice.” Keep your weight true; keep your stance honest; do not flirt with ghosting, for the board is literal and knows not your poetic intentions.
IV. The Litany of Low Battery (A Seasonal Psalm)
As daylight shortens, so too do our laps. This is holy math. Acknowledge the amber LED as a prophet crying in the wilderness parking lot: “Prepare ye the charging cable!” Do not scorn the 20%, embrace it as the altar call to plug in thy life.
Repeat after me, saints, the Autumn Commandments:
Thou shalt not sprint the last 2% unless thou also desirest cardio with a side of humility.
Honor thy charger and thy outlet that thy days may be long upon the greenway the Lord thy City hath provided.
Remember the cold and keep it holy: for lithium grows moody when the winds turn petty and the dew clings like consequence.
Thou shalt pre-heat thy bearings with gentle carves before ye attempt miracles in front of onlookers.
Thou shalt check thy PSI as thou wouldst check thy conscience.
And if you stumble? If the nose kisses earth and your pride meets pavement? Rise up, dust off, and testify: “I have slid but not surrendered; I have learned the geometry of mercy.”
Closing Words
“Where balance is even and daylight is fair, lean not upon bravado but upon the quiet carve; for humility is the true traction.” — Lamentations of Nosedive 7:10
May your bearings purr, your firmware be current, your PSI be seasonal, and your pushback arrive like a gentle usher with perfect timing. Go now, wheelievers, in peace and pieces avoided, to love and serve the Ride.
A-Wheel-men.
